Back into a world i thought i left behind

A clydesdale walks into a museum..the museum staff guy says "Why the long face?"

The past two and a half years personally have been an amazing feeling. It seems professionally they counted for nothing as i have ended up a job that i thought i would never go back to again...but it's not all that bad. More on that later. It seems to most people my time away was nothing more than an extended holiday and that i somehow managed to duck and weave my way around real responsibilities in the workplace and even though i'm the first to admit that our workplaces in China and Hong Kong were not as stressful as working in Melbourne, i am getting to the point where it seems that only Sab and I can ever truely understand what we actually did overseas.

We worked full time. We worked on Saturdays sometimes. I'm sorry to shatter the illusion that most people think that we worked 5 hours a week and spent the rest of the time exploring and getting pissed. We worked to the requirements that the role expected from us. So it surprises that there is a mentality of "getting back into the real world" but it's not like that people it's a case of "getting back to a more serious world."

The past two days have seen me start training on my new job at Fosters Group. Fosters Group for those outside Australia is one of the largest beverage companies (alcoholic and non alcoholic) in the world. There is a long and proud history to this company that i am now a part of and after a couple of days on the job, it's been information overload but very positive as well. There are 6 of us training for the job which basically is taking phone orders from around Australia. I honestly thought i had turned my back on the call centre world when i left home considering it contributed to me leaving the country yet in someways i feel like i have been given a second chance. This time i will do my job, don't complain (well not as much) and just save my butt off.

Fosters thus far have treated me very well and this afternoon we actually had to go down to the brewery to get a feel of what Fosters actually do. We saw the packaging, filling and labelling of bottles and then we were lucky to try some samples from the Fosters range. I was paid to go drink! I mean that's pretty cool right. No i didn't get pissed guys as the glasses were only small but it was a chance to taste the differences between the beers.

My hours are valied from 7am to 9pm and there is some Saturday work as well. The location is just south of the city centre and the people that i am training with are very nice people. The information overload has been daunting but thats stock standard these days. Fosters looks like it could be a good place to work at and if works a good part of my life then other aspects of my life will surely benefit as well.

It's early days but it's a good start.

A Day at the Races

A day with the family. A fantastic day as well.


I had fun.

Last year when i came back home for my flying visit i attended the W.S. Cox Plate at out local racecourse Moonee Valley. Last year i went with my parents who go with friends every year and as much as i enjoyed the day and the races, i got shitfaced due to the excessive alcohol i drank to pass the time. I state again i enjoyed the day but there was no one i knew outside of my parents on the table. This year Chris and Narelle joined me and i must say i had a fantastic day. Brothers in Arms

Now Melbourne during Spring Carnival is awash with the sounds of thouroghbreds thundering over the turf, champagne bottles opening in marquee tents, the shouts of the bookies in the betting ring and the screeching of pissed chicks making their way home shoes flung over their shoulders. For 50 days Melbourne is the centre of the horse racing universe and the Cox Plate is one of the biggest races on the Racing calendar.

Now i prefer the Cox Plate to the Melbourne Cup. The Melbourne Cup is such a huge event with 24 horses staking their claim as the premier distance horse for the year, it's more than a horse race, it's actually a tapestry of what makes Australia great. For me the Cox Plate is a race of quality over quantity. Only 12-14 horses take part at a venue that would be on par with Happy Valley in Honkers in terms of atmosphere and a sence of intimacy. The race last year was an epic and this years build up was the same. I'm not really into horse racing but i was really looking forward to coming back to the valley. The day started off with free drinks whereby half a jug of beer was gone before entree was served. There were 12 people on our table and the day just flew. I actually had to place bets on a race on behalf of the whole table. There were 6 horses in the race and i couldn't even pick a result. I know i'm shit at betting on horses and today was groundhog day as my betting legacy (or lack of it) continued on it;s merry way. I didn't picka winner all day.



But that didn't worry me. Just spending time with the family as a whole was great. The alcohol situation was better than last year as i didn't throw up this time but i did have a late night pizza as tradition would dictate. The Pepper family had a wonderful time at Moonee Valley and by the looks of it we will be back in 2007. This may be the start of an enjoyable relationship with the horses.

A letter from the editior

I know in these posts there are spelling errors ranging from slight to f*cking pathetic.

Sometimes i can't be bothered to fix them.

That's all.

Forgive me Blogger for i have sinned

It's been nearly two weeks since my last blog.

Quite honestly i just haven't had the desire to sit down and write about my life. For all intensive purposes it's been all about finding work. The past two weeks have really been a dampner for me because the search for work is just sooo f*cking frustraing in Australia that in my mind i thought "There's always Topkids" but that's taking the easy way out and man didn't get to the moon by staying on earth.

Two weeks have flown pretty quickly and in that time my paranoia of being back in Melbourne has died. I'm home now and i can't runaway from that fact so i've decided to make the most of it. I'm not putting any time limits on when i'm wanting to get back out because i'm not good at keeping to deadlines plus is takes away the feeling of enjoying my time at home. My life at the moment is all about "resurrection" as my dad so correctly put it a few days ago. I have had my time in Asia and that is no behind me and it's time to move on to the next phase which is about positioning myself to make best the time here.

In order for me to do that i need a job. My finances are low and with that i applied for the Newstart Allowance to keep me going during the time of job seeking. I've applied to god knows how many places only never to hear from them and wonder what happened. I waqs rejected for a job and a chain of travel agents for whatever reason and i was so pissed i wrote back and asked why? I have customer service experience and some travel experience so after i found that out (this was about 10 days ago) i was feeling very very down.

Then out of the employment wilderness a phone call appears. It's from Hays Recruiting..yeah the agency that decided not to have a bar of me after i dropped my details off there a few weeks ago. Another lady called saying there was a customer service position at Fosters Group. Now for anyone outside Australia (possibly this relates to Kate, Candace and Martine) Fosters Group is the largest alcoholic beverage company in Australia. The position is for customer service whereby you take orders from pubs and clubs. Pretty simple stuff. So after a couple days i was asked to come to the Fosters offices for an interview. The interview went pretty well i thought considering i was pretty nervous. This job was the best lead i had had in 5 weeks and i wanted to make a good impression. Luckily one of the interviewers had just been to China which worked in my favour as a natural icebreaker. I told her the TIger Leaping Gorge story and they both laughed.

I bounded out of the interview feeling positive about my prospects. Whilst applying for more roles Hays called back saying that Fosters was "impressed" with me. I think the only other "impressive" thing i've done with my life is give th Sizzler all you can eat theory a pretty good run for its money. Then again i was about 9 years old at the time so my "impressive" list has been dry for about 16 years. Well out of this phone call i had to do an online questionaire. Actually it was a beahavioural questionaire..all 108 of them. It took over an hour and on top of that on Tuesday i had to go into the city to complete a comprehension and maths test for this job. As my dear dear Sab said when she was going for her job "Seriously, are we applying for jobs at NASA or something?" So i made my way into the offices for the exam and the lovely lady whose legs i couldn't stop looking at told me that i had 15 mins for the comprehension (which i know i've spelt wrong) exam and 20 mins for the maths exam. Well i thought i did pretty good on the compre..well that one but the maths one i said to her afterwards "I thought the Hindenburg was less of a disaster then my maths." I've never been good at it and it showed. My family isn't mathematically or scientifically trained..we all can't stand maths and i was very depressed. I thought my one chance and i blew it bigtime. On the way home i stopped by a KFC and ate a large burger meal in record time doing 100 on the freeway. Tuesday night and Wednesday i felt very depressed.

On Thursday i made my way into the city as i found a part time job doing telemarketing for the Comedy Club in Melbourne. It's better than nothing so i made my in to their offices only to be greeted by no-one. The office door was locked and i waited around for 15 mins but no-one came. I decided it was time to go and i made my way back to Flinders Street Station 40 mins after i left it. Driving home from my local trainstation i decided to get some lunch at the local supermarket at that time i received a call from Hays again telling me i was successful and that i was being offered the position. I was releived (spelt that wrong too) that the search was over and that thie first part of my resurrection had been cemented. I start work on Monday and i'm looking forward to becoming part of the real world again. I am home and i'm working for a beer company so there as worse places to be.

Why "1984" won't be like "1984"

"For god's sake! What's Mark and Sab doing at a theatre?"

It seems Tim Robbins is a pretty busy man.

Outside of his movie career and his family responsibilities, he is also co-founder of the Los Angeles acting troop known simply as "The Actors' Gang." Now Tim is a pretty versatile actor. I cheered him when he made his way through the sewerage pipe during the "Shawshank Redemption", scorned him with his portrayal as a family man-cum-terrorist in "Arlington Road" and just flat out laughed at his stupidity as 'Nuke LaLoosh" in the classic sports film "Bull Durham." He is one of ther most versatile actors of the past 25 years and his adaption of 1984 shows not only his ability to break down a complex and controversial novel but '1984' hints at his paranoia in some ways of the role of government in society today.

Sab and I went of a George Orwell fix in Thailand. We both read '1984' , 'Animal Farm' and 'Down and out in Paris and London' so it was to great surprise last week that whilst surfing the web that i came across an ad for a production at Melbourne's splendid State Theatre. With this piece of news i called Sab who was equally enthusiastic to see this fabulous work come to lifeand if Tim Robbins gotta hand in its creation then it has to be pretty good.

A splendid theatre we have here in Melbourne

Now i haven't frequented the State Theatre much in my life. I remember going there in primary school and admired the red carpets and shiny surfaces. With Sab and I being the patrons of the arts we are we ended up in the cheap seats yet it seems in this theatre even the cheap seats are great. Unlike the theatre in Hong Kong, our view of the action wasn't impeded by an airconditioning duct which made it hard to follow the subtitles whilst watching "Turandot." Still the differences in going to the theatre Melbourne style are vast compared to going to the theatre in Hong Kong. For starters in Melbourne going to the theatre is an event.

The audience dress according to their ticket price here. Seen thnat we were up the back we were dressed not too badly but we would have been out of our league had we been closer to the stage. Once again, i've taken Sab out in style. The audience doesn't bring plastic bags or dress like they have just taken the weeds out of the garden herre as well. There is more sosfistication in the audience as they are here to experience the play rather than just watch it.

The play started and the stage was a simple black affair with only 6 actors used in the production. Much like the book, the mood and look of the play was stark.The central role of Winston was performed brilliantly by P Adam Walsh who drove himself into the paranoia and fear that his role required. The supporting cast was excellent yet their performances were difficult to follow as the play wass designed for each actor to jump between characters. The real winner of the night was the story itself. Orwell's words coming to life were more than enough for Sab and I to enjoy the night and the underlying feeling of the novels spirit tying into current day American politics was at the forefront of the audiences minds.

The Actors Gang did a fantastic job of interpreting '1984' in a very minimalistic sence. It seems that they wanted the words to be the star and they were at the expence of the acting. Still '1984' is a hard book to bring to thearte life because it is so stark and large an idea that a stage will never be big enough for its full potential to be seen. The only place it can be seen in its full light is in the readers imagination.

He ain't heavy..he's my brother.

Brotherly Love. Gotta love those trakkies!

I'll always giggle whin i hear the word "Camelot" from now on but more on that later.

Last saturday was my brothers 31st birthday. Now my brother is entrenched in his suburban life and i know he is enjoying ever second of it. It took him a while but he is at a place in his life where the world is becoming his oyster. He has a lovely fiancee`, a massive house that seems that could fit an entire Woodstock concert crowd inside, a job that he enjoys and is now presidentg of the local football club. I'm really happy for him as he has been frustrated for a long time (must run in the family) and all his hard work is starting to pay off. With that i made my way over to the suburb of Taylors Hill where the land is as flat as a pancake.

It was afternoon tea for my brother this year and my grand, aunties and thier kids came over and it was a great afternoon. These are the days where i missed my family laughing around the table having coffee and ckaes whilst the kids were destroying whatever playstation game they were subjecting themselves to. Chris' birthday was the first time i had seen my two little boy cousins, Adam and Hayden since i got back and boy had they grown up. They are 13 and 10 respectivly but they still are my little mates and before i knew it i was challeging Hayden to a game of NHL 06 on the Xbox. It turned into a 4-3 win to me but that's beside the point. It was great seeing these boys again and i promised that i would sleepover at their place on friday night and watch Hayden and Adam play basketball on Saturday morning.

The afternoon tea crowd made their way home and i decided to stick around with Chris and Narelle for dinner with a few of their mates. Well throughout the night due to various circumstances only one couple came over so i was at the start of the night a 5th wheel. I had met Feathers and Andy last year at the engagemet party but couldn't remember them from a bar of soap. With a name like "Feathers" i wasn't too sure what to expect but as the night wore on and the fish and chips were destryoed i came into my own. Sure the talk earlier in the night of wedding plans between the two couples made me want to slink out of the room and drive myself home but nope. i stuck around enough to get through that informative part of the evening.

After the fish and chippies Andy (actually i'll clear this up now. "Feathers" name is Glen and Andy is short for Andrea) pulled out a board game called "Scene It" which follows in the tradition of interactive games such as "Commercial Crazies" and "Nightmare"...maggot!!!
I teamed up with Narelle and somehow managed to win the game and i enjoyed it so much that i'll have to buy it myself in the near future to play with other people. Following "Scene It" came a round of "Pictionary" and i wanted to be an architect?...i can't draw!! So when it was my turn to try and draw "Camelot" it came out something like i didn't expect.

At first i tried to draw a castle but Feathers and Chris had no idea so i thought i might go for something a little more phonetic. So i drew a penis shooting a lot of 'spunk' which for some reason i thought one of the guys may say "Came -a-lot" aaa"Camelot!"
It backfired big time and got one of the biggest laughs i had ever seen. It was such a stupid way to try and draw Camelot but thats what i came (pardon the pun) up with. Afterwards we all watched "Mean Machine" whereby Chris could test out his new stereo system and it was working beautifully. It was a lovely day that turned into a fantastic night and i'm sure Chris had a great day as well.

Happy Birthday Bro.

For once it was nice to be an "Old Boy"

My secondary education took place at an all-boys Catholic school. Well theres a story right there but from the years 1991 to 1996 i was a student at one of the highest quality schools in Melbourne and looking back i could have done so much more with my time there. It is hard going through puberty at an all boys school and i wasn't the most comfortable person at school. I always felt a sense of hopelessness with my life and i would now christen that emotion "not knowing what you want to do with your life." Towards year 11 and 12 i thought i had found what i wanted to do (an architect) and i was so focused on getting into the course than when i found out i didn't i blamed the school rather than myself..i could have done more. I didn't. I failed.


My ability to socialise with the opposite sex was curtailed and therefore developed later that what is probably considered normal. I started only in year 11 when i studied geography and tehre was a girl in the class who seemd very nice but i wasn't the most confident with women (i'm still not now when it comes to close intimate relations) so i never pursued her. Another kid in my year level became her squeeze and i just let it go. It was a conflicting time for me at high school because i knew the world was out there but i didn't know where to go.

Still for a long time after i left in 1996 i had a anger towards the school and the years i was there. I thought the school and the kids in my year level weren't nice to me (just in terms of snobbing me) and i just didn't find a real connection to a group of friends. I floated between groups in my time there and the group i ended up with in year 12 i barely speak to these days.

A week after i came home i found out about the reunion and was generally excited. In one part to see the friends i made and see what they are up to now but for the past year my feelings towards St. Bernards had changed. When i left Australia i still had a feeling towards the school of "how come you didn't make me more successful" when i was the only person to blame. I was looking forward to catching up with the guys i knew even from primary school but some of the guys i sort of knew. Last Friday night rolls around and i drove down to the schools football pavillion where it was held. About 40-45 old boys turned up and the night was just brilliant. It seemed no matter what anyone was doing with there lives it was a chance to just forget about life at the moment and enjoy the company of the boys you shared some of the craziest times with.

Sinking back pots and fiddling with finger food, i made my way around the room and caught up with blokes who are now married, have their own house or on a good wicket. I myself right now are far away from that scenario but that doesn't matter. As one guy who i spoke to said "Pep i admire what you have done and you are the only guy i'm dissapointed to keep in contact with after we left." I felt the same and i said to him "Well that's in the past" and with that so were my feelings of resentment. All the old boys got together for a pic (which i'll try and get on here) and belted out a rendidtion of the schools war cry. Before i knew it, it was midnight and time to finish up. A few of the guys kicked on but i had the car and decided to go home instead. I didn't have the cash to go out plus i honestly didn't want to spoil the night by going into a drunken stupor.

For the first time in 10 years i didn't feel resentment because i had gained something much from my time at St. Bernards. It was a feeling of pride of being an "Old Boy."

The meaning of my life

It seems that ever since i got back home i haven't felt right. I mean my body is slowly getting better after the massacre it took in Southeast Asia and Taiwan but my mind just hasn't been right. Part of it was coming back to Australia under the circumstances we did and a case of reverse culture shock, part of it was a loss of independence being back home (though my parents have been giving me a lot of room to move) but there was something else i couldn't put my finger on about why i'm in a slump.

Yesterday in bed i figured it out.

I found being overseas my life meant something. I may not have been saving the world from landmines or finding the cure for cancer but i was teaching and i did make a difference in some peoples lives during my time "away." I instantly knew thats why i feel like Melbourne is no more than a place to hide from the world because that's what i did in Melbourne. I didn't feel like i had any freedom to go out and explore. I know some may say "well you can explore Melbourne anytime" but that's not the point. The point i'm trying to make is that when i was overseas i felt momentum growing in my life. Even though i may not have been the worlds greatest teacher i enjoyed watching my kids learn and have fun and that i was responsible for that. I loved it when the class laughed when i did something silly and i loved the relationships i had with my friends overseas.

Does my life mean anything in Melbourne now? At this stage no. I'm still job searching and i'm frustrated that the process is so automated these days. Example...today i was in the city and last night i saw casual jobs for ushers at the Victorian Arts Centre. I've always enjoyed the Arts Centre though i'm the first to admit i'm not a "patron of the arts" perse`. I thought this would be a great second job to extra cash to keep me going whilst being at home. So i walked to the centre and climbed the stairs to administration only to be told that "You have to fill out the online application form" I was so pissed off that here i was standing in front of a guy in a nice suit just wanting to drop my resume in and he wouldn't accept it.

My faith in Melbourne seems to be diminishing rather rapidly and i am slipping back into a routine where i was before i left. I know i've grown and i don't want to do a lot of growing in Melbourne for a long long time. I just want to go to work, come home and do other bits and peices. I'm a very confused person right now. My life in Melbourne seems to have no direction. I was making a difference by the emails that i used to send to everyone that i know. Though to me my emails were updates about what's going on to people back at home, they supposidly made a lot of people happy so when i came back i got a lot of questions about why i stopped them (i transferred to Blogger) and are they coming back. Well if that's the only way i've made a difference overseas then in the time i want to be here, how can i make a difference at home whereby everyones eyes are on me and there is no distance between people and my actions?

I'm just a little confused about my place in the world today.

I'm Generation "Nouveau Yobbo"

I've never been one to follow trends nor start them. In fact all my life i have wondered who actually starts trends? I've always imagined that someone, somewhere is sitting on a throne with servants around them holding new fashion trends or products that they have the ability to make cool or "so 1984." Sitting in a tent that wouldn't look out of place in Persia, the "creater of cool" would reign upon high as us mere mortals look for any sign of a trend like catholics in Rome anticipate the white smoke at the Vatican when a new pope is elected.

I've never felt comfortable about being stereotyped into a "yobbo" because i've always felt more cultured than that. According to wikipeidia a yobbo's characteristics consist of " heavy drinking, possibly to the point of alcoholism, low intelligence, fashionably ignorant (usually wearing thongs/sandals and cheap t-shirts and shorts) and usually a fan of Rugby League, Australian football, Cricket or V8 Supercars. It is through conduct at these sporting activities that the term has gained connotations of hooliganism."

Now i love a drink now and then (preferably "now") i also love my footy and are quite inclined to have the fashion sence of an Andy Warhol painting but still there are parts to my DNA that have always shyed away from the traditional "yobbo" vibe. At the other end of the spectrum are the twin towers of the "metrosexual" (the trait of an urban male of any sexual orientation who has a strong aesthetic sense and spends a great amount of time and money on his appearance and lifestyle) and the "ubersexual" (It is a variant of metrosexual, in that the male is "refined", but contains more of an implication of confidence and traditional notions of manhood than the former term).

Still that didn't feel right. I'm not in the class of a Clooney or a Bono. I'm just a boy from the burbs that didn't feel the wave of anger that Generation X'ers supposidly felt because i missed the post-Vietnam War confusion. I didn't even know I was part of Generation Y but it seems i am. The MTV Generation tag can go straight to the keeper because when i was growing up MTV was on for three hours on a Saturday night on channel nine hosted by peroxide king and future host of "Keynotes" Richard Wilkins and So far the closest Generation i can be classified in is the "Boomerang Generation" whereby kids come home after uni and live for their parents for a while and the relationship between child and parents is further developed. Sure my boomerang came back a little bit later than the generally specified age span but still that didn't feel like me.

Then whilst i was back in Hong Kong for the Grand Finale it hit me... I am "nouveau yobbo."

"Noveau Yobbo" represents an evolution of the Australian male who still loves his yobbo roots but isn't covered in tattoos of Peter Brock or roses ambushed by thorns. I love AC/DC and Midnight Oil but i also enjoy other musical stylings such as Crowded House, Missy Higgins and Franz Ferdinand to name a few. I love a drink but i enjoy all types of beers from all over the world and not just from Australia or Victoria. I feel that "nouveau yobbo" is a refined Aussie male who not only can have a great chinwag about footy but at least has a basic idea of the world around them.

The race riots in Sydney a few months ago really pissed me off seeing bearded, sunburnt pissed Aussie guy and girls saying "get back to your country" whilst chanting "Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi" and being fuelled by Bundy and Coke. It questioned my place in this country a lot and made me look inward and ask myself.."how can i define who i am?" After a few months of this question popping in and out of my head the answer came to me in Hong Kong. I know i'm more advanced than most yobbos out there but i'm not degrading them at all, i'm just not like you guys. I don't like tattoos or utes.

Basically a "Nouveau Yobbo" is someone who:

- Has grown up in Australia yet has experienced life over seas. No Contiki tours don't count.
- Who loves everything Australian yet understands there is more to Planet Earth than Australia.
-Who enjoys a drink with his mates but can appreciate beers, wines and spirits from overseas. You cannot try one Budweiser and say you are "nouveau" it has to be at least a 50% Aussie Beer to 50% Foreign Beer. Wines and Sprits are part of the "nouveau" experience.
- Enjoy your sports but don't go so far to decorate your house, wardrobe and body with reminders of your club or its colours.
- You love your family but you cannot use names such as Harley or Caleb but names like Jack or Sam are acceptable.
-You can hold a conversation about most topics in the world and you have a good idea of current news events. No you cannot use "Hey did ya know that such and such is drivin for Ford next year" as an example
- You read books and not just the Trading Post, People and Inside Football.
-You love a Chicken Parma but can appreciate foods from around the world and no a lamb kebab after getting shitfaced at the local pub doesn't constitute the be all and end all of food from around the world.
-Your beer gut is on its way out but the "bling" and "eye cream" aren't on the way in.
-Your dress sence still has a bit of style but you never wear Armani unless you are at a wedding or at the races.

That's just some of the ideas i have about "nouveau yobbo"

I like them.

Why Die?

Contoversial yet inspiring, haven't put this book down yet

"Why Die" is the name of a book i am currently reading about a controversial Australian athletics coach called Percy Cerruty whose controversial methods and outspoken opinions made him an enigma to the atletics community. Now Percy wasn't the fittest man in the world. In fact he was given two years to live when he was 44 years old. Coupled with a complete mental breakdown he radically changed his life by leaping head first into a strict and obsessive recovery that when completed two yeas later he became a media sensation by perfoming various distance running races and beating younger competitors.

Now reading this you may think "what's this got to do with you?" well i have been reading his book today and was totally fascinated by his life story. Even though my weight has fluctuated more than the price of oil over the past couple years i'm fired up to really get stuck into some training. I ventured down to the local gym whereby the stereotype of tank tops and gym freaks is on display. Considering the only was i could get there was on my old mountain bike that i thought i would never ride again, i felt that i really didn't feel 27 but 14 years old.

The trainer, Vito is a really enthusiastic guy and even if he is small in stature, his energy level would give some dodgy Russian nuclear power plants a run for its money. We went through each of the exercises and the proper way to do the reps. Whilst he was explaining the proper technique for a fly rep i looked around the gym and saw a cross section of gym culture in 360 degree beauty. The girl who flaunts her curves for the boys, the boys in singlets with arms that are too small for their ego, the middle aged Addidas tracksuit wearing dad who is straining himself to fight against the sands of time and the mums cycling away talking to each other in a way that their fitness seems to be an after affect from constant talking about their kids latest accomplishments.

I used to go to this gym before i left but i wasn't excited to go there. I felt shit and my motivation was more to just get out of the house and look like i gave a shit about my body for an hour before i went back home and drank two cans of Coke with dinner. I was working beautifully in Tin Shui Wai. In fact this time last year i was about 8 kilos lighter and was feeling full of energy. Since April my energy levels have started to slow but now it's time to kick myself in the ass and not go back to the ways i did before i left Australia.

I know i won't but fitness isn't exactly my strong suit nor is sticking to routine, so this time around i'm taking the "baby steps" approach to fitness. I'm not going to go to the gym looking for a quick fix but wanting to lay the long over due foundations for a healthy life because at the current rate of my health level i shouldn't feel as lazy as i am.

I purchased this book three years ago because i liked the title. Now i'm reading it because i' don't want to.

Getting older...it's not all that bad.

The Peppers circa 1981. I had blonde hair!!

My family unit has been a pretty tight bunch. We've always had each other to talk to and rely upon each other in times of uncertainty. My parents unwaving suppport of me being away from home was a major plus for me in my time in Asia. The reason i'm talking about this is that the family dynamic of the Peppers has shifted dramatically.

My brother is now established in his life with the lovely Narelle and my parents were settling into the survey bracket known as "empty nesters" then due to the disaster of Taiwan here i am crashing like an Australian Dupree. The four Peppers were happy in the way their lives were going but now i would say three of us are happy as i'm slowly getting familiarity taking over my feelings of reverse culture shock.

Yesterday was the first day i didn't feel freaked out by being back at home. I spent 6 hours fixing up my poor excuse of a resume and now it has 40% more shite in it. It looks a lot more professional and i should have a job by the end of next week, i hope i do as i found out my 10 year high school reuniion is coming up. I finally have a set of wheels to get around town on..thats right on...not in. My brothers old mountain bike.

My brother on Monday night was elected president of the East Keilor Football Club. It was something that i thought would never happen. So when he called with the news i was shocked. I know he has the talent to do but the confidence part was the big minus in his corner but i think it will be fantasstic experience for him and a money saver on the club as we all hope he takes more time trying to get success off the field rather than getting injured on it. So i'm thinking that makes Narelle the First Lady of East Keilor.

Yesterday i went to the gym for a physical assessment. It was the first time since Honkers that i made my way gym side and the guy who assesed me...Vito kept talking about A-League soccer. Now i haven't been to a match since it started last year but from what i have heard it's a pretty amazing atmosphere. My assessment came back with my height being 174cm, my weight being 87 kilos (i'm guessing this time last year i was 78-80) and my body fat at 27. The range i should be in is 12-21 so Vito is going to design a program for me and i find out the details of it monday.

Still home is starting to feel like home again.

September in Melbourne

Pies, Scarves, Footy and Beer - Yep it's Grand Final Time!!

Considering my last couple of posts have been on the negative side, there actually have been a couple of more positive moments in the now 2 weeks i've been home. For anyone that doesn't know Melbourne is the sporting capital of the universe. Anyone who tries to tell me otherwise will be getting a tsunami of sporting events this city holds back in their face.

Last Monday night was Brownlow Medal night. For anyone outside of this country, the Brownlow Medal is the highest individual honour in Australian Rules Football. Our family had some friends of the family over that i hadn't seen since i got back so it was wonderful to catch up with them. One of the major features of "Brownlow Night" is to sit and listen to the C.E.O of the A.F.L. to read out the votes for each of the 168 games played that year. For anyone that isn't passionate about AFL, it would seem that the guy was reading out numbers from the dewey decimal system. So instead of "T. Richards 1 Vote, R.Robertson 2 Votes, T. Barker 3 votes" after 14 rounds it may start to sound like "Ancient Indian History 687.98 Olympic Games 796.48."

This year the deciding votes came to the last round where by Sydney's Adam Goodes outvoted crowd favourite Scott West by three votes. I'm sure this sentence means nothing to most people reading this. Due to the popularity of this site this comment may only affect Candace and Kate.

Last Saturday, Sab came over to watch the Grand Final. It was lovely to see her again as it is starting to feel a bit wierd not seeing her everyday. We had a little chat about life which included a lot of shrugging and grunts but we are trying to make the most of it. Sab is feeling the same and with only her mum trying to comprehend whats going on in her head, she isn't exactly settling in as well as she thought she could. Still that wouldn't dampen the spirits as i received a gift saturday morning. Dad "No. 2" Mick came with 12 bottles of...Beerlao!!!

Yeah it seems that Reshelle (the yougest daughter) has a squeeze who works at a bottle shop. I'd only met him for the first time on Monday night and hes a genuine good bloke so to my surprise i had Beerlao to drinnk with the game. sab was so excited that she nearly drank one bottle by herself! The game was a cliffhanger and it was an amazing afternoon.

Teddy in front of the Show's landmark - A Pie in the Sky

Also during last week, I ventured down to the Royal Melbourne Show. It's been a long time since i went down to the "Show" to soak up the smell of cow shit and buttered popcorn. I made my way down thanks to "mum no. 2" Bev. You see, Bev has 3 daughters and I have my brother. During the 80's Chris and their middle daughter Shona were in primary school together and became freinds. Yep even back then he was turning on the charm. So with that the familes became close and now i have three "sisters" and Bev has two "sons." Anyways i made my way down to the Show with Bev to meet her youngest daughter Rechelle and her squeeze, Dave.

When i was a kid i used to go down with Dad and Chris usually after Dad slaved his way through another day at work only to be met at home by two eager kids wanting their dad to drag them in the back of the Mitsubishi Magna and wrap them up in their duffle coats. The only reason i wanted to go to the show every year was for the Bridgestone Precision Driving Team and the fireworks. Chris liked the rides where i just preferred to be part of the crowd.

Markey and Shell doing what they do best - destroying food.

I met up with my Aunty Di who works at the show. It was the first time i saw her and it was lovely to see her. We had a bit of a chat and she showed me around the new offices of the showgrounds. In fact the whole place has changed. It's more open and even though the size of the place is smaller you feel a lot more comfortable being in the crowd of kiddies clutching Cadbury Showbags and teenagers finally getting away from their parents and allowed to hang out by themselves.

By the way in the above picture, i'm eating a roast lamb roll.Ohh it was sooo goood!!

The great thing about Melbourne this time of year is that the events just keep on coming. After the football, the Spring Racing Carnival takes over and that's madness. For the past few years our house has hosted a Melbourne Cup Day which according to my parents has grown bigger and better since i left. Then the crickets in town so Chris and I will be heading to the MCG on Boxing Day for the Ashes rematch between Australia and "Ingerland." Add to the fact the Australian Open Tennis starts in Jan and we also have the A-League soccer as well, it seems sports will comfort me whilst being back in Melbourne.

I like that.

Everybody wants to work.

The "Uncanny X-Men" sang a song that seems to fit my life right now. I can't defend the pink and white striped t-shirt though. It was the 80's.

Na na not me!!

Recruiting Agencies must be sitting back and having a big old laugh. It seems that the days of just reading the paper and calling someone at the company that advertised the job is too much of an effort these days. Now you have to jump online and be greeted by a faceless website and then if...and I mean if you are lucky you will hear back from a lady usually called Sally or Janelle from XYZ Recruitment about a position that you applied for three weeks ago.

I’m bitterly jaded when it comes to applying for work in Australia. I came back with fire in my belly wanting to get to work straight away and with the constant riniging in my ears about how Australias job rate is at an all time low but the feeling of an all time low is swinging in my direction. It seems Australia has embraced the internet so much that any face-to-face conversation in the employment world takes too much time these days. I'm also angry because even though i might not be the best applicant for jobs, just get me in a room with someone and i'll try my darndest to sweep them off their feet and try to make them think i actually care about a career in the pertrochemical industry.

It's an industry that feeds on lies and slight of hand tricks on your resume. Rather than saying i was a "kindergarten teacher" and tell the truth, i've written "educational trainer" instead. This kind of crap makes me sick. I was happy in Hong Kong and when i said i was a "kindergarten teacher" there wasn't any reason to hide behind some wanky terminology.

It seems telling the truth of what i did won't cut it in the job market here.

The last of the analog generation

I thought this would be a great name for a book I would probably not write in the future about my time and place on this planet. This all came about when I was at my local shopping centre, Highpoint. The last time I walked into the behemoth that is the centre it was under renovations to make the centre larger. So last Thursday rolls around and being school holidays the place is jammed packed which contributes to a feeling of paranoia and lack of space set in. Unlike Hong Kong where I could be both lost in the crowd and part of a larger following of activity at the same time, this time around I felt out of place and out of step. Stores I didn’t recognize selling products I had no idea existed. Music stores blasted out songs from artists who were born when I started high school whilst teenage kids walked around in designer ugg boots.

I remember coming here as a child and being overwhelmed by the smell of the fish market which these days is currently the site of a café that tries its hardest to be the most happening place in Melbourne north west. Flakes and lobsters have been replaced by lattes and bruschettas and I don’t like it. I have outgrown this centre that gave me my first job and my shortest job as well. The shortest job lasted about three hours. It was actually a tryout to be a commentator for toy camel races. Much like the wardrobe I had to wear, the job just didn’t feel right. I’m too old for Highpoint and I got out of there as soon as I could.

I’m 27 and I came from a generation that seems to have been the last of the “traditional” way of life. A time where the church was still held in some esteem; where the feeling of community was winning the battle against a society becoming more individualistic. I was raised with the belief that your life moves forward and you gather momentum with your life experiences along the way. The feeling of going backwards was starting to hit me and being at the shopping centre was one way of reminding me that what I thought my life would be for the next year is no where near what reality is putting in front of my face right now.

I didn’t like it one bit because I felt that the last 2 ½ years have been for nothing where I know deep down in my soul that there is something bigger in the world. As much as I love my family, I’ve lost the feeling of freedom the most and that is what’s making me agitated being back at home. I was getting into the stride that was comfortable for my life and now I’ve had to pull into the pits and have a “stop-go penalty” of one year due to the disastrous events of Taiwan and it pisses me off. That feeling will change in the fullness of time.

This is Australia

Home Sweet Home...yet home has changed for me.

As Vietnamese Airlines Flight 856 landed in Melbourne I had a feeling of coming back to a place where I knew I could be the master of my life rather than the ‘city’ becoming the master of me. Yet before I could address that situation Sab and I had one last hurdle to get over, Australian Customs. Now us Aussies are pretty stingy when it comes to bringing back souviners from overseas. I was afraid for a little while because I wasn’t sure that I would have to declare my fantastic little Cambodian Cow Bell. That was a non-issue as the major concern was the over 300 DVD’s I had stashed in my bag. I threw away clothes so I could fit the movies in there. They were my lifeblood (as they were Sabs) for our time in Asia so we took a chance rather than leave them in our boxes as we knew that if they were left in the boxes, they wouldn’t have made it past the Customs officers at the docks.

I was lucky enough to be waived through but Sab wasn’t so lucky. After taking out three of her 80 CD holders that had most of her DVD’s the Customs guy let her off with a “severe warning” as she had “an unusually high number of DVD’s.” I think Sab would have jumped over the counter and smacked the Customs guy senseless with her illegal copies of ‘Seinfeld.’ Sab also helped me purchased some grog and smokes for my family as the amount needed was more that I could legally bring into the country. Thanks Sab!

The re union with the parents was fantastic to say the least. My feeling of coming home was now complete and with this happiness I found myself back at Norwood Drive in my old room feeling a sense of nostalgia. I was back in the room where I grew up and I have come back a different person. I know deep down that even though the stay here is temporary, I don’t want to get too attached to life here because I honestly don’t want to get sucked in by my surroundings. I did that after university and I felt trapped by East Keilor and I don’t want it to happen again.

Throughout the day I visited my Gran and thanks to dads driving we drove through Footscray and Newport listening to the best of the Bee Gees CD. Two old industrial suburbs which these days look nothing like the days before I left. On the way back from Gran’s I told dad that I had to purchase some adapters for my laptop and phone. After driving along we eventually ended up at an electrical superstore. Dad waited in the car whilst I popped inside and somehow came across a face from my past.

I was in an aisle just browsing for the cheapest adapters when a voice floated over the USB Ports before I turned around to see that face...the face of the man who sold me my Apple iBook three years ago. Of all the computer departments in all the electrical superstores in all of Melbourne…I walked into his.